Those that bind
by Moka-girl
Summary: With a different way to begin the tale, a new hope, the whole story changed, and so... did the Titans.


Disclaimer: Teen Titans does not belong to me, and I ain't getting any money from this.

A/N: Except for my other story, a translation, I'll have this going. I've wanted to do a Teen Titans fic for some time, but had to wait until I had my own computer, enabling me to watch all the episodes online and research if I need to.

...

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_**U**nder the guise of a snake_

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**O**ne day, I told my parents I wanted to do ballet. I had seen a news coverage on ballet dancers of the opera, and I wished to be able to do the same thing. Agreeable, my parents had done the necessary for me to start dance classes, and had done the same for my sister, who had gotten interested when I mentioned it. I had started a beginner's class and, for several years, every Wednesday afternoon, I had danced. There had been exercises at the barre, leotard suits, tutus and all the rest.

It had been... bearable. At the time, I believed I had to want it dearly, with all my heart, to become an accomplished dancer (that was what the lady on the TV had said). Me? I had really wanted it, but that simply wasn't enough. My legs were like the legs of a bar stool, obstinately longer than my arms could reach. To my knowledge, I have never been able to stretch enough to touch my toes without bending my legs. Added to the fact that the teacher was a mean hag to me, you can guess it wasn't all that fun.

"Dancing is a discipline much too distinguished for such a graceless girl as yourself," she often repeated to me, her pleasure evident.

When I was about nine, my dance class had started being taught how to dance to jazz, too. So when the spectacle of the end of the year would come, we'd do a part of classical dance, and another of jazz. It was in March, when she started to concentrate fully on the jazz routine, only making us do the classical dance once a month to be sure we remembered it.

Unfortunately, it was also around that time that I caught several sicknesses, which resulted in me going rarely, if ever, to my dance classes. When the grand show came, the teacher told me to do the classical part, but not the jazz, since I didn't know it well enough.

The classical part had us all in costumes of rats, with cute little ears and a rope on our backside acting as a tail. It went as planned; all the teacher's favourites were in front, and the others, like me, were hidden in the back. When the jazz part came, I watched from the side-lines, hidden so that I wasn't seen.

The part that really marked me was the end. Because you see, at the end of the show, all the dancers come on stage to bow and be seen one last time. Unfortunately, I realized that the members of my class would go out in their jazz clothes, all in black, and that I was still dressed as a rat. I couldn't change, because I hadn't bought the jazz clothes, since I wasn't going to perform that part. And I couldn't just waltz out in my rat costume, and be the only one, now could I?

Desperate, I went and asked my teacher - you know, the one that was always mean to me - what I should do. Despite my dislike of her, I still thought of her as the solution. At the time, I viewed adults as separate beings from myself and other children, holding the answers to everything.

She told me to stay backstage.

I can't even begin to describe how I felt, but it was very close to awful and sad and unhappy at the same time. So I had watched, tears in my eyes, as the audience clapped and cheered, while I was hidden backstage, where I was told to stay.

After that, I never had ballet classes ever again.

The next sport I tried was handball, which was just as much of a disaster. I had no reflexes, bad coordination and couldn't throw a ball hard enough to even hope to score.

Worst part was - I was the only girl in the group.

Eventually, I whined and was such a brat to my mum that she got me out of handball.

Then came swimming lessons.

I knew how to swim, because I often had lessons in the summer, but this was different; it was all year round, and the pool was _inside._I made a friend, and learnt that I really liked swimming, if not for the fact that I had trouble breathing while doing front crawl.

My parent's divorce came and went, my mother unable to take it anymore and asking my father to leave. I often cried, sad that they were separating. Then, a year later or so, came my uncle's suicide. He was my mum's brother, and we were in vacation in the alps at the time. Dad drove three hours to come see us and give us the news.

Mum didn't believe him, but it just didn't make sense for him to drive so much just for the sake of a practical joke, so eventually she kinda... burst into tears and sobbed into his shoulder.

When I turned eleven, my mother was depressive, and the original owner of the house announced she wanted to live in it. We were only renting the place, but there was a whole juridical fight that eventually we won, and we got to stay in the house for maximum three years, until we found somewhere else.

Mum wanted a fresh start, somewhere new, but I hadn't understood until she announced where we were moving to just how fresh a start she wanted.

California.

_America._

For the young European girl that I was, it sounded just as exciting as being a famous swimming champion, my dream at the time.

x

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I was awake before my alarm went off, but that didn't stop me from groaning when it rang. Through half-lidded eyes I located my phone, and my hand shot out from under the cover of my quilts to retrieve it. I silenced it by pressing a little button in the corner, and lay back to stare at my ceiling.

It was still early, but there was enough natural light for me to see the big poster of Avril Lavigne that replaced the sky beyond the roof, and the little fluorescent shapes around it.

Taking a deep breath, I threw my legs out of the bed and sat up, feeling the morning chill through the open windows of my room immediately. I tip-towed around my bed, mindful of my still-sleeping family, and picked up my clothes.

Now that I was awake, I felt self-conscious, because I was standing there only in my knickers. Sometimes my sister had a habit of barging in to see if I was awake or not, and it had often been embarrassing for me to be seen so bare. She always teased me about it, and despite that I couldn't bring myself to sleep with pyjamas on. It always felt so restrictive, and I could never sleep properly.

I put on my white bra, then the dark blue tee-shirt with green leaves stitched on it. My trousers were the same ones I had worn yesterday. I didn't like them much 'cause they were too tight around the thighs, making it impossible for me to pull them up in a way that would make my backside look good, and they were a bit uncomfortable.

In a drawer of my small bedside table was my watch, kept in there so that the ticking wouldn't stop me from sleeping. I got it on and exited my room, turning right towards the door of the bathroom.

Tiled white walls greeted me as I rummaged around for my make-up. I applied dark eyeshadow on my entire upper lids, and didn't forget the mascara. I never managed to use the mascara properly, and there were always smudges on my skin, but they were invisible thanks to the eyeshadow.

Next came a simple black barrette, the keep my fringe out of my eyes. With my decision to have my hair long again, came the sacrifice of my fringe, now too long for me to have loose without walking into a pole. It came all the way down to my cheekbones, covering the entirety of my forehead and eyes.

"Oh god," I muttered, staring at my reflection.

Yet another spot on my face, near the edge of my mouth. A great white pimple that I squashed, getting the pus out. With great care, I washed the area with a bit of soap. Satisfied, I skipped out of the bathroom and went down the stairs for breakfast.

Down I went, past my youngest sister's room, another bathroom and my mum's bedroom, staying as silent as possible. Rikki had already eaten; she always woke an hour early to get ready, even though we went to the same school.

"S'il suffisaiiiiiiiit qu'on s'aimeuuuuuh... S'il suffisaiiit d'aimeeeeer~~" I sang, opening the fridge.

Recently, mum had started buying cereals that were healthy, instead of the chocolate ones I was used to, so I generally ate a yogurt coupled with a sliced banana. I liked mixing the two, sometimes adding sugar for a better taste.

Still singing, I got out a yogurt with one hand and the orange juice with the other, closing the door of the fridge with my elbow. I grabbed a spoon on my way to the dinning table.

I'll admit it felt weird, this oppressing silence, as if I was alone in the house.

I placed everything on the table and went down the four steps that led to the living room, grabbed the remote and switched on the big flat-screen TV mounted on the wall. It came to life, showing the news. I didn't have anything special I wanted to see, so I left it on that channel.

I went back up to the table and watched TV through the glass barrier while eating. I realized too late that I had forgotten to take a glass down from the kitchen with me, so, shrugging, I drank the orange juice straight from the carton.

"_This is the second robbery this month. The authorities stated that they-_"

I had been surprised when my mum had told me we were moving, two years ago. Mostly because I had no idea how she could afford it. But Switzerland is the most expensive country in the world, so living anywhere else would be a breath of fresh air, instead of a monetary chore. I discovered, after researching the city we would be moving in to, that the crime rates were extremely high, causing the prices of houses and apartments to drop, because less people wanted to live there.

"_-a gang-war, with several casualties, many of which were minors. The mayor has expressed his concerns for the safety of-_"

Damn it. It made me sick, listening to people talking about how depraved and rotten the town was, as if we didn't know already. But don't take me wrong; I like this place, really, I do. I've never been unlucky enough to witness any of those crimes they talk about on TV. Worst I ever saw was my sister stealing chocolate bars when we were kids, and _I_had been helping her.

I finished up 'breakfast' and went back up to the level my bedroom was at, turning to enter the bathroom instead. I found my sister in there, applying some light make-up.

I brushed my teeth, sneaking a peak at the time.

6 h 55.

Good, I still had time.

While doing my teeth, I got out some perfume and dabbed some by my neck, and then sprayed some deodorant on my armpits, under my tee-shirt.

"Whatcha doing?" I asked Rikki.

She didn't bother looking at me as she answered. "_Ikke noget."_

I had been expecting her to say something else than '_nothing'._But she generally just ignored me when I asked such questions, knowing that I was already aware of the answer and was simply trying to find a way to entertain myself.

I took the time for a quick pee before skipping off to my room for my schoolbag. I retrieved my agenda to take a quick look at what I had written there, in case I had to bring a certain book in class or something.

_Bring notebook (A4) for Chemistry_

Snap. I had forgotten about that.

My bedroom, being in complete disarray, didn't make it easy for me to find my notebook. In the end, I decided I would just have to ask Chloe for a sheet of paper if the need did arise.

Rikki was already putting her shoes on when I came down. I went over to the fridge and took out a Tupperware with leftovers from yesterday, some rice and chicken, as well as a plastic spoon. I already had a water bottle in my bag, so I didn't need to worry about drinks.

Mum and Hailee were eating their breakfast, so I took the time to smile and greet them as I laced my trainers.

"_God morgen!_" I chirped.

"_God morgen, Alawn,_" mum answered.

Hailee was too busy eating to do anything else than grunt her acknowledgment.

I left before Rikki, too impatient to wait for her. The door, as always, was hard to close; Ihad to pull with considerable strength to hear the small '_click_' as it shut.

I walked off towards the bus stop - it left at 7h14, so I had a little more than ten minutes to arrive there.

My sister caught up with me as I left our street, filled with houses similar in every way to ours. White walls, many levels and huge windows, making it look very modern. Appleby Haven was a group of several houses, thirty or forty, all similar. Mine was in the E2. The houses were actually split in two, to house two different families. I was lucky to live in a house by the front, where we could admire the ocean.

I felt pretty cold, but told myself to ignore it and trudged on, feeling my bag bounce with every step I took.

The bus stop was nearby a forked road lined with quaint little houses. A few people were already waiting there, chatting with each other. The bench was taken, obviously, and I desperately wanted to sit down. Grr...

"The bus'll be there in 2 minutes," Rikki reported, her gaze on her watch.

The sun was coming out now, a brilliant explosion of yellow and orange, looking as magnificent as ever. I was the only one watching, but I knew that in a second Rikki would join me, looking at the sun.

x

x

"Chloe, I can't find the make-up remover!" I whined, making my voice extra-pathetic.

It had the effect I was searching for; My best friend laughed.

"You're so silly, Alawn, it's right there." She handed me the object.

While I got rid of my make-up, Chloe undid the zip of her jacket. I closed my eyes and rubbed the cream in, and when I opened them again she was in underwear, picking up her cosplay.

There was an annual manga convention that happened in Jump City, and the die-hard fans would organize pick-nicks every month for people to come at. Of course, in order to be allowed you had the be dressed up.

Chloe and I were going as Tsunade and Orochimaru. It had been easy for her to decide on Tsunade, because she had already been Sakura last year and she wanted to be able to try out a character where it wouldn't involve her having to bandage her bosom in order to make it appear smaller. I had wanted to do TenTen again, but Chloe wouldn't have any of it; I had to be another Sannin, so we could like, have a match, a connexion.

It was either Orochimaru or Jiraya, and as a bit of a yaoi fangirl that had seen quite the doujinshi involving the pale man, it was easy for me to choose him and dismiss Jiraya.

The biggest problem would be the yellow lenses I'd have to put on, because I abhorred anything getting in contact with my eyes, but I was ready to try.

She slipped on the clothes while I stared dubiously at what I was supposed to wear, but eventuslly I gave in.

Ten minutes later I came back out of the toilets, where I had changed. I looked exactly like my character, except that I had yet to put on the lenses or the purple make-up. I had been growing out my hair for some time in preparation for this, so a wig was not necessary.

I was wearing a black sweater with a high collar and long sleeves, gray trousers rolled up mid-calf, the whole being covered with a beige tunic split on both sides of my waist to my knees. The tunic was surrounded by the ever-present purple shimenawa, and I was wearing ninja sandals that had cost me a fortune to get. I had my legs covered in bandage that I had gotten from my mother, who worked in a doctor's clinic.

Chloe was sticking a small shape on her forehead, and once done jumped up in victory:

"I'm ready!"

I wasn't.

I still had to get the lenses on, because I couldn't do Orochimaru's make-up if it was just going to get smudged as I tried to get the hellish things on my irises.

"Listen, Squirrel, I don't think I can do this." I announced, nervously fingering my right earring.

"Old Owl, you have got to be kiddin' me." She sighed, exaspered. "We've been planning this for months! You can't just bail on me _now_."

I paniced. I just wasn't strong enough for this.

"But I-"

"NO BUTS! It'll be okay, I promise."

Once everything was sorted out, we left our bags in our respective lockers at school to be retrieved tomorrow morning, and hit the city.


End file.
